Friday, June 12, 2009

Bong Pen ebong Maku


2 bochher kopchechhi Bongpen, je kopchanir ektaai daaknaam hote paare;
Aniyomito Hnechki!
Tobu 2'ti bachhor to..

Besh kichhu highly dispersed khamcha-khamchhi,how-mau-khau!Budhho, Sourav,Quasab, Sumon theke gaa ghin-ghin'e Prem-Pita-sentiment porjonto katona gholaate naakani chobaani..Eisobei Bongpen. Tobu kichhu kotha baad thekei jaay. Sei kichhu kothar baad thaaka niyei to Smriti, Bhalobaasha and pyat-pyate Bongish sentiment.

Sob cheye baro kotha sei manush'tar kotha'i adure brishti'r moto baad theke gyachhe, jaar buddhi ebong jukti'te bongpen'er suru! Jaake niye Team Bongpen. Kyamon manush tini? Mota-sota manush'ra jerokom hon aar ki; bhaalo khaaiye, romantic ghumiye ebong alaapi! Tobe ektu bidghuteo byote. Takhon college'er first year; sob'e Prem-market'er dynamics assess korte niyomito furfure half-punjabi chaapiye bikel'e haat'te berochhi. Emon ek bikele bhaablum, ei
manush'tike daaki; dual-hunting e berono jaabe. Taa jei naa taake daak diyechhi, alosh bhaabe aamar proposal ke flat kore diye bollo "Pocha, jwalasne...Dictionary mukhosto cholchhe.S porjonto ese giyechhi..aar 2 week..tar modhye Cambridge'er soft copy amaar magoj'e bhaasbe! Bujhli? Achha, bol dekhi Arcane maane ki?", Er kono maane hoy!

Manushti'r naam holo Maaku.School theke jabotiyo udbhot hujug oii supply kore aasto. Din'er por din, maajh-dupure non-bisleric jol'e dobaano fuchka niyomito kheye amra joutho-udyog'e ek saathe jaundice'e porechhilam, sei theke amaader bhaari dahorom! Eii Maaku ekdin amaay dhore bnedhe niye geslo Park Street'er laagoya ek ghupshi hotel'e. Giyei se smartly order dile "Do Beef Biriyani please". Aami bhebre gelum.Bole ki? Bamun'er chhele hoye goru chebabo? Blasphemy, aya! Kintu Maaku'r oi ek gun, oke naa kora jaay na. Maa janle je amaay bari chhara korte paare, seta jaan sottyeo ama bari chhara korte paare seta jaana sottyeo gile fellum. (tobe iye...tasty chhilo..tarpor nijei du ekbar udyog niye..ektu aadru..beef biriyani ba roll cholechhe aar
ki)!

Maakhu bibidho bhaabe nijeke display korte bhaalo baasto.Bondhu'ra layek haoar por ekdin madyo-paan'er aashore bosechhe. Sobar haat'e Scotch, Vodka, Rum! sudhu aami aar Maaku nengti indur'er moto Pepsi aar entho murgi-bhaaja niye matobbori korchhi. Whisky'er glass haat'e tamaam mataal'era bottoms up jharte suru korlo, Maaku'r pourush'e ghaa laaglo. Maaku announce korlo je se Pepsi niye bottoms up korbe, orthaat ek chumuk'e puro aadh liter'er pepsi'r glass sesh korbe. Keu patta dile na. Aamake saakkhi rekhe Maaku Pepsi te mega chumuk laaglo ebong songe songe raam-bishom! Uff se ki bhoyanok, ek er por ek hnechki, Maku ekkebaare najehaal! Jakhon ektu sustho holo, saanto bhaabe bollo. "Pepsi'tar content'e gorbor chhilo, bujhli Pocha! Ekdin ek litre Pepsi ke ek chumuk'e uriye toke dekhiye debo"

Eheno Maaku, ekdin or 33 khaana dnaat display kore bolle, " You see Pocha, paati chaakri-taakri te sukh nei. Poisa kom, boss'er tyandai-myandai plus Debu Ghoshal maarka uchhe-begun life style! Er cheye barong chol..amraa raataraati celebrity bone jaai, publicity-autograph-poisa-girlfriend-egg-chicken roll...every thing will flow"!

Ami paati intellect'er maanush. Maaku thatta korchhe na jukti saajachhe taa thahor korte paari ne. Bollum, "Ki kore, Film banabi?"!

Maaku bole " Tomaar mundu...amaar maatha! Bhaddorlok'e aajkaal filim kore, plus okhaane gestation period'o lomba..Aaami baapu khata-khatni te nei", Maakur chokh'e serious jhilik!

Ei baar aami jege uthlaam.Kaan khaara, merudando taan-taan; No khaatni'te celebrityhood!Ei to chaai! Joy Maaku.

" Aaamra Blog khulbo", Maaku gombhir bhaabe ghoshona korlo, "sera Baangla blog, blog'e traffic baarbe..advertisement aasbe, poisa aasbe, aro traffic,aro poisa, aaro advertisement..."

"Blog?" Aami porlam akaash theke, "Blog banabo? Ki niye? Kaake niye? Ke likhbe"

Maku bhuru knuchke, naak benkiye janaan dilo, "Tomaar maathar modhye jato pound gobor achhe taai niye blog hobe. Tomaar brainless life niye hobe! In short it will be about nothing!Aar tui likhbi: about nothing..kintu likhbi. Aami manage korbo,promote korbo and control korbo! Content jaai de, its all down to marketing Pocha!No chinta, blog super-hit hobei, amaader competitor koi?Bhule jaas na tor modhye commercially saleable stupidity achhe, aami sudhu setaake channelise korbo..aar taarpor.."

"Tarpor?" Aamaar bhitore rakto takhon futchhe. Kolkatay e-bubble, poisa, celebritydom, Larry Maaku Barujjye ebong Sergei Pocha Mukhujjye.Ahho!

"Tarpor...we will outgrow our blog, Bujhli Pocha, blog theke takhon taatka website, jhnaa-chok-chok'e maamla!All across the world...Bangali maatroi amaader naam'e selaam thukbe, koto fan mails cum prem patro paabo aamra du jon'e, minimum 1200 per day per head."

"Poisa-kori'o mondo noy bol?", Ami takhon collapse-mukhi.

"Poisa?You mean money? Overflow, overflow hobe, Millions'e hiseb raakhte hobe, obishyi dollars'e, karon amadre company'r existence thaakbe biswo-jure,Mankundu..Manilla- bangali kothay nei bol toh!Amra hobo biggest Bong Entertainment Company"

"Company?", Aami obaak hoye bhaabchhilum Baba'ke ekta pellay gaari kine debo, aar ma'ke ghuriye aanbo Puri! Behala te ekta flat kine nebo..thuri...Behala keno?Behala noy..Park Street'e ekta Dupelx kinbo..duplex mane thik jaani na..tobe Maku'i ekbaar bolechhilo pellay soukhin ek dhoroner baari hoye jaake bole duplex styled! Oi somoy forsha, sundori sob meye'ra nischoi amaar aar Maku'r pichhone ghur ghur korbe..tobe maofswoli-gochh'er kono bheto meye'ke
entertain korbo na. Smart jhok-jhoke jeans-skirtini hobe se..fotor fotor engriji..Madhyomik'e second division paaoa Pocha Mukhujjy'er mem-maarka girl friend, kya baat! Achha jodi poisa-kori sottyeei tyamon hoy, aami aar Maku mile East Bengal'er jonnye ek-duto European second division Striker antoto bhaara kore aante paari na? Ei Alvito-daal-bheto diye aar cholchhe na! Tobe Maaku byata ghoti..o nischoi Mohun Bagan, Mohon Bagan korbe!

Ei jakhon deem-murgi-poultry swapno daana baandchhe, aachomka ek nidarun fotaash ebong nipaat ek omlette bheshe uthlo jibon-ghotito Frying Pan'e,Bongpen. Maaku kisob saanghatik chaakri peye prithibi-moy chorki kaat'te laaglo. Aaamio nijer mundu theshe dilam Sorkari Chakri'r helmet'e.

Bohudin Maaku'r kono khabor nei. Maku biye-thaa kore Bou-chhele niye ghor songsaari, aajkaal naaki bejaay gombhir hoyechhe. Antoto serokomi khabor paai. Achomka ichhe holo phone kori oke! Dial korlum, Maaku'r 5 bachhor'er chhele Mickey phone dhorlo. Maaku'ke chaitei se bolle
" Pochakaku, Baba ekhon kotha bolte paarbe na. Ektu osustho hoye porechhe..1 litre Pepsi'r bottle dhore direct mukh'e gnuje diye bottoms up korte gechhilo, golay aatke bishom kheye ekaa-kaar kando, ekhono hnechki tulchhe!"









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